Space Nuts

The Main Cast:

Stormy: Princess Hubba Hubba of the Clitorian System. Whoever weds her gets her star system.

Evan Stone: Buzz Starfokker, proprietor of the Floating Balls Space Casino and unlikely hero.

Randy Spears: Jeeves the android sidekick of Buzz and robot manservant to Princess Hubba Hubba.  Randy is hysterical in this role.

Mike Horner: The Evil Overlord after the hand of Princess Hubba Hubba in marriage.

Kyle Stone: General Warts the not so bright Colonel Klink (remember the 70’s TV show Hogans Heros?) look a-like right hand man of the Evil Overloard.

Devinn Lane: The dominatrix Evil Witch, her specialty being interrogation.  I couldn’t figure out why she was hanging out with the Evil Overloard.  She didn’t seem to be quite a member of the crew and she wasn’t a sidekick.

 

 

The story opens with Princess Hubba Hubba giving an ensign played by Trevor Zen an unofficial accommodation for doing things like standing at attention.  He’s rather nervous about the entire thing, after all, the princess is really coming on to him.  He gets with the program quickly enough when she starts blowing him.   Meanwhile Jeeves is in the kitchen hitting on the appliances.  I will never be able to watch another movie with Randy Spears without picturing him asking a space-age blender if it’s AC or DC.

No sooner does Princess Hubba Hubba finish with the ensign then she has a sub-space communication from The Evil Overloard.  She turns down his marriage proposal again and he tells Warts to fire a warning shot across the bow of the ship.  Warts thinks that warning shot means blow something to smithereens.

Scott Styles, a member of Princess Hubba Hubba’s crew that was just promoted from soda jerk, is rescued.  In one of the funniest bits yet making fun of Hal from 2001: A Space Odyssey  The Evil Overloard gets into a fight with his ship about opening the pod bay doors.  “I can’t do that, Dave.”  The Evil Witch watches on in annoyance throwing insult after insult at the Overloard.  It become quite obvious that he would have accomplished nothing without her help.  Finally, Scott Styles makes his appearance for interrogation by The Evil Witch.

The light bondage scene between Scott Styles and Devinn Lane here was incredibly intense.  Devinn is no stranger to using a flogger and I was hoping that she would be the one to reward Styles for coming forward with the information he had but that wasn’t to be the case.  She called upon hologram Kim Chambers to reward him.  I guess I shouldn’t have been too surprised, considering Scott Styles and Kim Chambers were married at the time.

This is something that I like about Wicked Pictures.  They go out of their way to make a couples film a real couples film.

Welcome to The Floating Balls Space Casino.  Buzz has a disagreement with someone he is playing poker with and there is a scene spoofing the every popular Star Wars question “Who shot first?  Han or Greedo?”  In this case Evan Stone would have been Han and Greedo was played by a man in a gas mask.  Guess all the good costumes were taken.    In this movie Jessica Drake (Uwhora) is a blue alien and I am pretty sure Captain Kirk would have done her as well if he had been visiting The Floating Balls.

One of the running jokes is everyone screwing up Buzz’s name, even his own crew.  (”Starfucker, Starfokker, same thing.”)  He is notified that there is a life pod aboard with passengers.  Turns out to be Princess Hubba Hubba and Jeeves.  Since no one gets a free ride, Princess Hubba Hubba is put to work in the cabaret and Jeeves becomes a pleasure droid.   His first “customer”, Kaylani Lei.  She keeps pushing buttons (well, his nipples actually) to get the right mood music and the right personality, a Frenchman.  Randy, did his best to stay in android mode through the entire scene which gave most of the attention to Kaylani.  It worked out great even if I did find the metallic silver decorated bedroom annoying.

Next Buzz finds himself being molested by Uwhora, who doesn’t just want to cuddle.  Another real life couple making the scene incredible because of the chemistry.  The only problem is Buzz is thinking about Princess Hubba Hubba the entire time he’s banging Uwhora, and accidentally calls her Princess.  He assures her that it’s a term of endearment like sweetheart or fuck monkey.

The next sex scene was not necessary to the story but it was there anyway just to prove that running holodecks with jungle programs don’t get wasted, even on The Floating Balls.  Steve Hatcher and Katie Morgan start out groping each other like a couple of kids not sure what to do before they get into the scene.

In other parts of the Floating Balls, The Evil Overloard and Evil Witch are harassing Starfokker, wanting to know where the princess was.  Buzz does everything to distract them and at the wrong time the princess ends up having to perform, bellydance style, for the members in the cabaret bar, including The Overloard.  She does everything that she can to prevent him from seeing her face but he becomes taken with her and her bad dance routine, thinking it’s the greatest.  After her performance he even starts asking her if he understood the story behind her dance moves, like the part where she was wiggling her ass was the hero being welcomed home.  She goes along with it and anyone watching the movie really starts to wonder how this idiot has taken over so many star systems.  He insists on removing her veil, discovers it’s the princess and all hell breaks loose.

Aboard the Overloards ship Princess Hubba Hubba is dreaming of marrying The Overloard on the holodeck.   The Overloard turns himself into someone that the Princess would be more attracted to with holodeck technology.  As he is going through various options, she freaks out at the thought of having sex with Ron Jeremy.  The cameos he has been making in movies the last several years in non-sex roles provide the right amount of humor.  Finally, the Overloard gets it right and turns himself into a tattooed stud played by some guy named Julian.  His tribal tattoo work is incredible and I have been trying to find more information about him.  Unfortunately, there is always more information available about the women of porn than the men so I haven’t learned much, except he also does gay porn.  With the show he put on with Stormy I would have never guessed.

In his quarters, complete with a Klingon Sword of Kahless on the wall,  General Warts is in his jar of “Inst-a-date”.  Just add water.  Think Lilo and Stitch with the experiments.  You get little balls wet and you get aliens.  In this case thought it’s girls.  It beats blow up dolls.  He can’t decide if he wants pink or silver (what is with all the damn silver in this movie?) and decides on both getting Amber Rain and Phyllisha Anne.  One dressed in pink wig and clothes, the other in silver.  Honestly, even with the excitement and kink of this being a three way it pales in comparison to previous scenes with Stone/Drake and Chambers/Styles.

Another somewhat disappointing scene was the next one between Stone and Lane.  I have seen both of them in some incredibly wild and rough sex scenes before and I was expecting something a lot more rough and intense than what was given.  Here are two people that could have probably ripped loose on each other giving the performance of a lifetime and it was one of the more subdued sex scenes that I have seen either of them in.

The Princess rescued and everything right in the Clitorian system, Jeeves and Starfokker are rewarded with medals.  Jeeves is going off about how “That’s not right.  I am metal and they give me metal.”  The princess finally gives Jeeves his other reward, a sex robot of his own played by a rather pink Holly Stevens.  There was an entire bit between them that I couldn’t stop laughing at referencing koi fish.  At least he can quit hitting on kitchen appliances and strange computers.

Starfokker gets a pink slip for a new floating casino and his private reward from Princess Hubba Hubba which I am sure he appreciated more than the new casino.  The chemistry between Stone and Stormy is incredible giving the scene that feel that it should, that good triumphed over evil, the good guy got the girl and all is right in the universe.

I rented Space Nuts and wish that I would have bought it.  This is one move that I defiantly want in my collection and not just because of the Evan Stone factor.  This is really one of the best adult movies I have watched.  It rates up there with Pirates, Let’s Play Doctor and Hercules, another movie made by Johnathan Morgan.  I am defiantly going to have to start checking out more of his movies.

One of the things that I really hate about renting movies is that you only get the movie CD, not the one with all the special features.  I know that I missed something not having them since they are award winning.  Special features hold much more excitement for me than DVD menus.


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