It’s A Secretary Thing is a mostly pleasant offering from Patrick and his posse at Elegant Angel. Apparently, After the success of It’s A Mommy Thing and It’s A Daddy Thing, we can expect many more niches to be treated like some kind of “thing.” I believe Dr. McCoy said it adequately in the first Star Trek film: “Damn it Jim, how come every time we don’t know what something is, we call it a thing?”

In the first scene, with find Shyla Stylez and an uncredited black guy. In fact, none of the cocks are credited until the end, which is no big deal, since I could really give a rat’s ass about the male talent. She starts him off with a nice, quick foot job. She’s not bad with her shoes and toes, and I might have liked to have seen more of it. She moves on to oral shot mostly pov style. He’s big, but not freakishly gi-normous like most of the pan-afrikan talent in the biz. She does a nice job grabbing on to his tie while she she blows him. Sadly, she never takes his unit all the way... typical hot blonde, who never works as hard for the money. Her oral technique could use a little work. I’d be happy to help her learn. They then switch to cowgirl style. She rides him pretty well and let’s him in deep. It ends quick, then it’s off to reverse cowgirl. I guess the director wanted us to see those titties bounce. She does some grinding on the schlong, a nice hula action. The obligatory cunnilingus.... Yawn! I don’t like watching pussy eating, so the best thing I can say about it was that it was over quick, less than 60 seconds. They engage in doggy style. I would have liked more of this, but there is less than 60 seconds of doggy style, then back to reverse cowgirl. He’s flat on the floor, letting her do all the work, then finally comes to life. They do some missionary, on the desk. It’s pretty much the same camera shot all the way through. At least it is well lit and you can see everything. For the cum shot, it’s open mouth on the tongue. She swallows. Well, that’s a fine end to an average scene. There’s dialogue after the scene... like any of us are interested... or can hear what she’s saying.

Scene two brings us Ashley Blue and some guy with a weird accent. Ashley wears glasses, so you know she’s a secretary. The pearls are a nice touch. They start with oral, in the form of face fucking... and that’s good stuff. After watching that last scene, here’s something to finally get me horny. There’s lots of spit. If there were only more spitty face fucking in the world, life would be better. I love the nice garters and stockings as he undresses her bum and gives her a spanking. He sticks his fingers in the mouth and pussy, which ain’t my thing, but at least he’s good at it. They do some doggy style standing, she has one foot on the floor, one on the desk. It’s fine technique on her part. There’s more face fucking... and why the hell not? He takes a short trip to the snack bar for cunnilingus, again quick. I think the director must be as unexcited about pussy eating as I am, and only throws it in there because he feels he has to. Then they start some anal action, in a reverse cowgirl posiiton, with lots of hand action from both on her clit. She reacts the way you want a girl to react during buggering... pleasured and pained at the same time. They move to doggy style anal on a chair - her ass is straight to the sky, very inviting. She gives him some oral. It’s possible ATM, but since there was a cut in the shot, we don’t know for sure, he might have cleaned his pecker. He sticks his fingers in her ass, as she sticks her ass up straight to camera for a nice look. He starts ass-fucking her in a modified pile driver, she’s in a contortionist’s yoga position. FInally, he cums in mouth. Get ready for more of this.

Scene Three is a g/g with Karlie Montana and Carly Banks. They start off playing with post-it notes, which is an interesting touch, but I’m not sure it will start a fetish, i.e. “It’s A Post-It Note Thing.” The sex starts when Carly snacks on Karly’s pussy from behind. They go into 69, then do some toy work. Carly starts on Karlie with two toys, one in the pussy and one on the outside. Carly does toy work with Karlie in doggy position. Karlie does the same for Carly. Overall, Karlie has the better reaction. Or was it Carly? I have lost track at this point. They close with Carly (or Karly) in the chair, more with the toy.

The fourth scene is a quicky, with Jamie LaMore and an uncredited white male businessman. I like the pink lipstick, which we see her putting on in the women’s room. There’s a bit more of the secretary fantasy, with Jamie bending over the file cabinet. She wears black stockings and garters, and geeky glasses. For the opening oral activities, Jamie is on knees. She not only doesn’t go deep, she barely takes a centimeter. It appears that Jamie needs some learnin’. They do some doggy style on the desk. It’s true about Shyla and it’s truer about Jamie, the hot blonde acts passive while doing the nasty. There is missionary on desk, and it’s over in a flash. They switch to reverse cowgirl on desk, and then he cums on the desk... What the fuck? It’s a strange end to a very quick scene. This one is so short, it would be hard to get off to it unless you were 18 and potent.

The final scene features Jenaveve Jolie, Evie Dellatosso and uncredited middle-aged white male. Here’s a prejudice alert: I’m down for any scene with Jenaveve in it. There is actually some foreplay in this one between Jenaveve and the male.Jenaveve plays with a giant vibrator. Evie joins, and there is some lengthy, unnecessary dialogue (I don’t need it to be gonzo, but they should do that stuff before the sex starts.) The worst part is, they shooter isn’t using a decent microphone, so what’s the point? There is a great make-up job on Evie, she looks really pretty in this one. Jenaveve works the giant toy on Evie, while she blows the guy. Jenaveve eventually eats Evie’s pussy, and sucks on her titties, which droop a little, but hey... that’s what happens when they are real. After a bit of this, they then share the cock. Once done, Jenaveve fingers Evie. Evie fucked mish, while Jenaveve works the vibrator. Evie tries to eat Jenaveve’s pussy, but she’s too turned on (since Jenaveve knows her sugar spots.) I’m kind of hoping Evie will squirt in this one, but Evie only squirts when she squirts (she won’t fake it and can’t predict it, and it never happens in this scene.) Jenaveve is then fucked doggy style, which is nice, as she was only doing g/g for awhile, but is now back to b/g. She knows how to take a cock slow, has some technique and reaction that the blondes could learn from. Once done, Evie takes the vibrator to Jenaveve. Evie is fucked reverse cowgirl. Jenaveve masturbates. Evie is fucked cowgirl while the guy eats Jenaveve’s pussy. Evie fucked doggy style while Evie plays with Jenaveve’s pussy. I know this sounds like a highlight real, but in a b/g/g there is a lot going on. In a humongous surprise, the cock cums mostly in Jenaveve’s mouth.

For my money, the scenes with Ashley Blue and Jenaveve and Evie make it worth the buy.

EXTRAS: Bonus scene (with a secretary theme, uncredited), Pop shot recap Photo gallery, trailers, website info, More adult fun (ads for phone sex)

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