Okay…those of you who have read my reviews probably have noticed that I have a thing for “classic” and “vintage” porn. Not that there’s anything wrong with modern productions, but the classic titles have a quality about them that you just can’t find these days. And, other than a few friends of mine who don’t mind waiting while I cue-up the VHS tapes and find particular scenes we want to watch, my opinion seems really lonely out there. Maybe you’ve never seen porn from the 1970s-1980s. Maybe you saw them when they were first released but don’t remember them today. That’s where I hope to come in and help!

“Classic” porn was shot on film – and that’s a lot harder to do than how many of today’s productions are done in digital video. Today if you don’t like the way a scene worked you can delete it right on the spot. If you worked with 35mm film, you had to shoot the entire reel, wait for it to be developed, and hope that nothing got screwed-up in the processing before you get a chance to view it. Many of the classic movie directors and producers went to film school and wanted to use the styles and techniques they learned in their textbooks. Now...we can all agree that most porn movies were never meant to be overly artsy or on the same quality as high-budget blockbusters. But, that doesn’t mean that they didn’t give it their all in trying to achieve that standard. Many included sappy dialogue that wasn’t necessary, costumes that seemed a waste of money because they weren’t worn for long, and lighting techniques that either completely obscured the action or made the stars look garish -- but you have to give them credit for trying!

Some of the “classic” titles, however, also provided the biggest laughs…unintentionally, that is. There’s nothing like laughing yourself silly over boom mikes in frame, the shouts of the director being heard over the dialogue, reflections of camera guys in the mirrors, and horrible acoustics of cheaply-rented motel rooms that allow traffic noise to bleed into the recording. And there were also many that could only be tolerated by using the fast-forward scan button. It was a lifesaver on many occasions when you wanted to rip your own head off over how much you paid for a crappy film and couldn’t stand watching it in real time.

Since I mostly review classic porn it doesn’t mean that I don’t like modern porn. Actually, I do like it. And soon I will be posting reviews of new releases. And while some “classic” porn doesn’t get better with age, remember that some “classic” porn fans do!