Reviewing for AdultMaven 101: Suggested Guidelines for New Reviewers
- By Steve Maven
- Published 03/30/2008
Steve Maven
I've worked in the adult industry for years as a producer/director, a sometimes performer and a porn journalist and reviewer. It's been one wild, crazy ride, let me tell you. I'm thrilled to bring my industry experience and contacts to AdultMaven. I want to use them to help give all you reviewers greater access to this hot, wild business we all love.
Take it from someone who has been doing this for years: porno isn’t art and reviewing it isn’t the equivalent of critiquing Shakespeare’s latest discovered lost sonnet.
Still, the consumers who come to AdultMaven take their porn very seriously and depend on us to advise them what titles they should buy in our store or watch over on Yappo.
Hence, we reviewers should treat the subject seriously and professionally too. This is not to say that humor shouldn’t be a big part of our reviews. It absolutely should be. This is porno for Crissakes!
Here then are a few suggested guidelines – emphasis on suggested – for beginning reviewers critiquing that latest all-double anal or cum farting master-bate-piece from Sleaze Productions. I offer these as a way to make reviewing on AdultMaven easier for those who have never done it before and above all else, fun. I want to emphasize that I am not suggesting any type of reviewing-in-lockstep formula that stifles your creativity. So here goes:
- The most important thing in any porn flick is – drum roll, please – the SEX. If the sex is hot, then the movie should get a good rating. If the sex is weak, even if the movie has high production values, then the movie should not get a good rating. Simple really. Porn has one purpose and that is to get the viewer off. If it achieves that, it’s a good porn flick. If it doesn’t, it’s not. I’ll take a cheaply-made but really nasty porn flick any day over an expensive one with weak sex.
- Try to summarize your overall feelings about the title in your first paragraph, then support your feelings with numerous specific examples with lots of key words from the various scenes in the body of your review. Don’t start your review by saying something along the lines of “the first scene in this movie is really hot.” At the end of the review, you may want to offer another summary, but worded differently from the first paragraph.
- Avoid overly-broad generalizations. Yeah, OK, that latest release from Sleaze Productions really sucked, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that Sleaze Productions sucks. The next Sleaze release may be a multiple load-launcher and win tons of AVN Awards next January in Vegas.
- As mentioned above, write with humor. This is porno, not No Country for Old Men or There Will Be Blood. Even “serious” porn dramas (such as the inevitable porn version of the Coen brothers Oscar-winner – No Cunts for Dirty Old Men, perhaps?) with scripts and acting are frequently unintentionally laughable.
- Make sure to list the name of the production studio right after the title of the movie. Some of our reviews don’t list the studio and it’s important that we do so that the studios will see the PR value of sending us their screeners for review. No studio will want to send us their free screeners if they don’t get credited in the review.
- Finally, this goes without saying, but make your copy as grammatically spotless as possible; use your spell check before turning your reviews in. Capitalize all the appropriate words in the title of the movie you’re reviewing.
- One other thought: I’d encourage all reviewers to become as knowledgeable about the adult industry as possible, which will then enable you to write with more confidence and authority. Check AVN.com and Xbiz.com regularly. They are the two best sources of adult industry news out there.
Feedback? Comments? Criticisms? Leave a reply here or shoot me an e-mail at steve@adulktmaven.com.
We’re all in this together. It’s you reviewers who define AdultMaven as a true adult community and who will continue to define it as we evolve. So please, keep those reviews coming. Your efforts are invaluable.
Spread The Word
4 Responses to "Reviewing for AdultMaven 101: Suggested Guidelines for New Reviewers" 
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said this on 31 Mar 2008 3:15:20 PM CST
I got first dibs on No Cunts for Dirty Old Men:)
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said this on 31 Mar 2008 11:26:24 PM CST
A book that I highly recommend is "The Big Book of Porn". It's a fascinating history of porn.
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said this on 17 Jun 2008 11:48:12 PM CST
Dear Steve,
I'm about to submit my 1st sample review. Hopefully this will lead to something good for all of us, so please offer & continue to offer suggestions/criticisms of my work so that I can offer the best.
Most importantly, I am a bit of a feminist. Do you think it best that we use that as my niche to get my own following, or what? It seems that even if I say this nasty film is so degrading to women, it might make some want to purchase it. As a former lesbian, now married with children, or "hasbian," I'd love to review films that feature that.
Thanks for all of the advice you can give me -- Michele.
P.S. Michele Angel is the pen name I use as a political journalist. Should I stick with that? I don't see why not. I already have name recognition there and if a senator or someone recognizes my name, I don't foresee a problem with that, but feel free to offer another name for me. I haven't yet thought of another name. I did decide to use my private e-mail address, instead of my professional one, which I gave to Diamond. Take care.
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said this on 19 Jun 2008 11:16:53 AM CST
If your point of view is that of "a bit of a feminist," then that's your point of view. Some other AdultMaven reviewers also have that point of view. But I'd suggest staying away from reviewing the harder, nastier stuff that might offend you, sticking instead to more "sex positive" releases, read-deal lesbian fare, couples features, etc. In other words, we always encourage our writers to review releases they think they are going to like. As for your pen name, it's a good one. Stick with it. Makes me think of Joanna Angel.
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